Parents on strike

Here's an interesting story from the Herald Sun that says, of kids:

Many parents have failed to create a spirit of co-operation and mutual respect, and find it's time for a new approach.

So, abandon whatever you have been doing. It doesn't work, and if you keep doing the same thing in the same way you will always get the same result.

Lose the Rambo attitude, sarcasm, character assassination and ultimatums.

Threats are the most common and least effective tactic used by parents.

They automatically trigger defensiveness and a power struggle.

Start by drawing up a list of regular, age-appropriate jobs, ensuring the chores are fair and evenly distributed.

Ensure there is a regular time and day agreed upon when chores must be done.

I recommend a three-step process:

• Show the child how to do the task;
• Do the task with them the first few times;
• Let them do it on their own and praise them when they do a good job.

Don't nag or shout and don't go into broken-record mode. One or two reminders are sufficient.

Try this: "When in the next 30 minutes would you like to feed the dog, set the table, put away your laundry?"

If they don't do something after having been asked once or twice, take away privileges.

On the second request, say in a calm voice: "If you don't do it now, computer privileges are gone for the day."

Some families allow their kids to play their favourite music, loud and throughout the house, while the vacuuming is done.

Finally, the issue of money. Some parents pay their children for work around the house, but I think this is suicidal.

It is wiser to keep jobs around the house separate from pocket money.

Offering financial remuneration for them to do chores sets up a dynamic where the child is no longer helping around the house as part of belonging to the family.

Instead, they learn to see it as a financial transaction.

This can lead to industrial action, and you'll find yourself in drawn-out collective bargaining in which they argue that the money isn't worth it.

Remember, there is no arbitration commission to help you out.

The idea of a working childhood is one we need to embrace by allowing childhood to flow seamlessly into adult life.

I love the picture that came along with the story:

On strike ... mother Cat Barnard takes her frustration to the front yard / AP

Parents of the world- unite!

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